Breaking News on Hillary Clinton
Headlines From Today’s Breaking News
Orlando Chronicle: Hillary Wins DNC Academy Award For Portrayal Of A Honest Candidate
DNC Chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Shultz today presented Hillary Clinton with an Oscar for her role as a honest democratic presidential candidate. During an after-party interview Wasserman Shultz noted “Hillary’s ability to pretend she hasn’t changed her position on a range of key issues, and dedication to sticking to her talking points regarding her secret email sever and Wall Street speeches is praise worthy. While accepting the award, Hillary Clinton committed to continuing her act in the general election.
Miami Post: Video: Hillary Clinton Actually Wiping Her Blackberry “With A Cloth Or Something” Rare footage from a top aide has emerged of Hillary Clinton physically wiping her Cell phone with a small cloth. The former first lady has recently been described as “often confused” by staffers and the press, leading many to question whether or not the democratic frontrunner actually understands “wiping the server clean” is a technical term and not a literal one.
Tampa Herald: Bill Clinton To Endorse Bernie Sanders As Most Transparent Candidate
Former president Bill Clinton has shifted support from his wife’s candidacy towards Bernie Sanders due to Hillary’s lack of transparency with voters. In a public statement the former president stated that “Bernie Sanders is simply the most honest, transparent and trustworthy democrat candidate in the race for president.” When asked what caused the sudden shift in support, President Clinton cited a full page of scandals from her email server to Wall Street speeches.
Florida Post News: Hillary Supporters Successfully Name Her Accomplishments
In an surprising turn of events, Hillary Clinton supporters at a local rally were able to list accomplishments of the former first lady. When asked to name any accomplishment of their favored candidate, Clinton supporters Diana and Jeff Jones quickly stated her ability to win super delegates and clinch the DNC’s support over Bernie Sanders. The Jones’ also highlighted Hillary’s ability to relate to everyday Americans.
Disclaimer: Today is April fools and the articles above are not actual articles… but you already knew that.
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